What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
I think that living in the "now" is the worst fucking ghandi buddha whatever advice bc that means I'm just gonna get drunk in the now.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
