I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
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