We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
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He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
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I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
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