i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
And despite my lack of successful relationships I'm a fucking guru
That's like claiming you're a good coach but going 2-12 last season
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
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