How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
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