I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
Randomize
