I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
Randomize
