My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
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