So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
Randomize
