You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
Randomize
