I think i peed on brittanys purse
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
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