I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
Randomize
