I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
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