one might say we're banned from that church
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
No more Irish car bombs ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
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