I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
it's great music for shaving your balls
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
