kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
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