My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
Someone came in the potted fern
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
Randomize
