In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im part way to drunk.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
Foreign objects found in purse this morning include: chocolate covered pretzels, pepper spray, and farm animal shaped key chains (you know the ones you squeeze and fake poop comes out, yea those)
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