it was like eating out sand paper
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
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