your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
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