I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
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