How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Randomize