Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
Randomize
