hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
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