You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
