does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
Randomize
