Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Randomize