He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
Girls should come with a carfax report
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Randomize
