break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
Randomize
