What a fucking waste of an outfit
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
we thought you were sober enough for a movie but you took one look at emily blunt and screamed "aw this bitch?!" and passed out 30 seconds later
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
Randomize
