another moral hangover. fuck.
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Randomize
