My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
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