omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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