im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
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