they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
Randomize
