with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
Randomize
