Texts From Last Night

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  (419): View more from Ohio

  my computer doesn't work...

  (619): View more from California

  why?

  (419): View more from Ohio

  i puked on it last night

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  (419): my computer doesn't work... (619): why? (419): i puked on it last night http://tfl.nu/kifb
  Replies (4) Good night (723) Bad night (2309)
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  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis

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  (781): Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis http://tfl.nu/4nxt
  Replies (22) Good night (3698) Bad night (571) Order T-Shirt
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  (301): View more from Maryland

  You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.

  (240): View more from Maryland

  Why does tequilla always make you text me?

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  (301): You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate. (240): Why does tequilla always make you text me? http://tfl.nu/qeax
  Replies (13) Good night (3976) Bad night (668)
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  (818): View more from California

  So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice

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  (818): So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice http://tfl.nu/dh5p
  Replies (94) Good night (8836) Bad night (702)
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  (613): View more from Ontario

  I spent all night sexting your girlfriend for you because you were too drunk. You're welcome.

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  (613): I spent all night sexting your girlfriend for you because you were too drunk. You're welcome. http://tfl.nu/nxz1
  Replies (35) Good night (11777) Bad night (1038) Order T-Shirt
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  (843): View more from South Carolina

  I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.

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  (843): I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you. http://tfl.nu/lcu4
  Replies (11) Good night (937) Bad night (4227) Order T-Shirt
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  (775): View more from Nevada

  I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...

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  (775): I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral... http://tfl.nu/9wf7
  Replies (28) Good night (5109) Bad night (1361) Order T-Shirt
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  (970): View more from Colorado

  I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking

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  (970): I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking http://tfl.nu/lf0q
  Replies (8) Good night (2531) Bad night (1115) Order T-Shirt
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  (516): View more from New York

  Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment

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  (516): Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment http://tfl.nu/52np
  Replies (4) Good night (2978) Bad night (1331)
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  (928): View more from Arizona

  Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...

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  (928): Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out... http://tfl.nu/6hjg
  Replies (2) Good night (918) Bad night (591) Order T-Shirt
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  (419): View more from Ohio

  I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.

  (1-419): View more from Ohio

  I'm out of town so we should be golden.

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  (419): I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me. (1-419): I'm out of town so we should be golden. http://tfl.nu/4amm
  Replies (5) Good night (2008) Bad night (310)
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  (763): View more from Minnesota

  Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...

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  (763): Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana... http://tfl.nu/pyu2
  Replies (21) Good night (1729) Bad night (424) Order T-Shirt
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  (907): View more from Alaska

  Can I color on your dick again?

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  (907): Can I color on your dick again? http://tfl.nu/t2pd
  Replies (12) Good night (1190) Bad night (433) Order T-Shirt
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  (217): View more from Illinois

  he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.

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  (217): he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex. http://tfl.nu/9sp5
  Replies (4) Good night (915) Bad night (458) Order T-Shirt
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  (417): View more from Missouri

  I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.

  (309): View more from Illinois

  You rock my world.

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  (417): I just smoked weed out of a baked potato. (309): You rock my world. http://tfl.nu/p2ud
  Replies (4) Good night (795) Bad night (280)

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