didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
I'm passing your future prison.
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
Randomize