Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
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