OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
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