so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
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