Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
Randomize
