Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
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