YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
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