I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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