yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
Randomize
