How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
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