this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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