Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
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