i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
