the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
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